RANT: Clingy with Unrealistic Expectations

 I'll start this off with some halfway good news.  It appears that I am no longer intolerant to ADHS and am less dependent on Vitamin C.  I was still weakened by Magnesium Malate but the ill-effects were not severe.  I did another "sprint" this morning of an estimated 150 meters to 0.1 mile.  3 days ago, it took slightly more than 1:00 to finish it.  Today, my time was down to 51 seconds.  Bad news is that the hamstring pain is still there.  Though I am improving, I likely need another week off.  Even then, I will need to go very easy the first few days. Now, here it comes.

Nowadays, I rarely even interact with strangers who contact me on social media because I've had too many negative experiences.  I made an exception last month.  A woman liked and commented on a few of my pictures from Miami.  I looked at her profile and saw that we share interests in both travel and fitness so I followed her back on Instagram.  

After exchanging a few messages that seemed to be a screening process, she asked to chat on Whatsapp instead.  That's normally a flag because her IG account won't last long.  Indeed, her account was deleted or disabled just a few weeks later.  For what?  I don't know.  

Her first message expressed interest in building a friendship on here.  Good.  Green flag.  If she had said that she was madly in love with me already, 9 times out of 10, she or he is up to no good.  In a couple weeks, they will be hit with a major emergency and an urgent need for cash.  No close friends or family can help so they turn to someone with whom they recently began chatting.  I know better than to fall for that trap.  I will immediately block anyone who asks me for money or gift cards.  

I guess I'm old school in that I am not real big on texting.  I do like to get a good morning greeting and maybe a few others during the day but I'm not going to chit chat, especially when I am supposed to be working.  I was asked about my beverages of choice when hanging out at the pool.  I meant to reply but was in the middle of my month end reports and it slipped my mind until evening.  I was called "rude and disrespectful". This was after just ONE missed reply.  It happens.  I apologized and pledged to do better in the future.  Now, suppose that I didn't reply to news about a sick relative who is in the hospital, YES, that would be bad.  My beverage of choice is hardly an urgent matter.  If you really want to know, ask me again and I will answer if I am not in the middle of something important.  

Despite the initial dust up, things seemed to be going pretty well over the next couple of weeks.  We even discussed taking a trip together in the future.  I did say that I would have to spend a day or two together before I commit to anything big like that.  I said that I could possibly be in her area as early as next winter and suggested a meeting spot.  I expected to receive her input but got no reply.  I didn't flip out.  We never spoke on the phone but I did send her a video greeting in which I used her name.  I expected to get a video reply but I didn't.  Again, I didn't flip out.  The day before I left for California, she complained again that I wasn't engaging enough.  I explained that I had to tie up a few loose ends before the trip and please don't be upset if I don't talk much during the trip.  After all, I cannot text and surf or text and drive at the same time.

You can probably guess what happened next.  I was called "extremely rude and disrespectful" for "selective replies.".  Stupidly, I apologized again and told her to please understand that I had very little free time.  It's impossible to text and surf.  When she piled on after that, I decided that I'd had enough and abruptly blocked her.  Good call.  Sadly, that's been the usual pattern for me.  Several other "relationships" have gone similar to what I just described.  Again, she didn't exactly have a perfect record of responding to me but claimed that she did.

I don't have a lot of experience with women but I know enough to realize what it would be like to date someone like that.  Her expectations would be totally unrealistic and would be blind to her own faults, which is a double whammy.  I would have to walk on egg shells to avoid her wrath while having to tolerate the very things that she complains about when I do it.  No Thanks.  I discussed this with a few female coworkers and all of them were on my side.  Perhaps my younger self would try to make it work by being a simp and always accepting the blame.  Not so now.  Perhaps I am simply not cut out for relationships and ought to fully embrace the single life 

Injury Update 2/ Para Purge

 The news is mostly good.  I am pain free when walking now.  I did a couple very slow 150 meter jogs this morning and could still feel the pain.  Not quite ready yet.  I will rest this weekend and try again either early next week or next weekend.  Even if I have to wait until next weekend, that's only 3 weeks off, which is not as bad as I feared.

In other news, I ordered a new supplement called Para Purge.  I wasn't expecting it to be very effective.  There are different schools of thought regarding parasites.  ARL claims that most everyone has them and the aim should be to create an environment in your body that is not so hospitable.  However I have read other testimonials that have said it's life changing.  One is the key ingredients is none other than Eye-Vermectin.  Without much to lose, I decided to give it a shot but waited until after California.  A negative reaction is still a possibility.

Early response:  

Not a miracle cure but I did feel slightly better after the first dose so there is no autoimmune reaction to it.  It's kinda difficult to assess how I feel because I am not running.  There is a possibility of nasty diarrhea in which the parasites come out.  Nothing like that yet.  

Vitamin C:

I actually forgot to take it yesterday morning and didn't feel THAT bad.  It does appear that I am becoming less dependent on it.  I have not tried the ADHS yet and will update this when I do so.

Update:  No discernable reaction to ADHS but I was still weakened by Magnesium Malate 

San Diego and Orange County Road Trip

 I took a Los Angeles/Tijuana road trip 3 years ago.  Though I did stop in San Diego and Orange County, I didn't do justice to either of them and sought to change that.  I hastily signed up for the America's Finest City 5K after a week of decent training but injured my hamstring pretty badly just 1 week out.  Racing was out of the question, and I feared that I may not even be able to enjoy the ocean, but the trip was still a go. 

8/14-

3 AM wake up call.  I wanted an early flight but not quite this early, but it worked out fine.  After an easy connection in Dallas, I arrived in Santa Ana just after noon.  It was the closest airport to most of my destinations and probably a smart call to avoid LAX if possible.  From the airport, it was only about 20-30 minutes to Huntington Beach (Surf City USA).  I did take it a little easy out there, but the sore hamstring was of no concern, and I stayed in the water until about 5 PM.  It was a rare overcast day with temps in the low 70s.  The water temperature here normally tops out around 72 but this summer has been cooler than average, so it was around 70.  After the initial shock, I found it comfortably cool out there and still enjoyable even with the overcast skies.   After I got out, I overheard a guy mention Alabama and the Gulf so I struck up a conversation.  Lo and behold, he used to live there.  His name was Javier and I enjoyed meeting him and his girlfriend Sofia.  No pics because I didn't have my phone on me.  This would be the first of five beaches that I would sample on this trip.  My hotel was about 2.5 miles up the road so I grabbed a pizza for dinner and just relaxed for the night.  

8/15- 30 minute drive on PCH down to Laguna Beach.  Every beach has a different vibe but despite a bit of seaweed in several spots, this was my favorite.  Clear water was an aqua tint and strong surf.  I went down a couple times and got consistently good rides to the shore.  There's also beautiful cliff side scenery.  My only gripe was that parking is difficult to find in the afternoon and prices are outrageous.  I cut my session a little short for this reason.  Today, we got some afternoon sun but it clouded up before sunset.  However, it was crystal clear just a few miles inland at my hotel.  Strange.  

8/16- About a 90 minute drive south mostly on the freeway to Ocean Beach just outside of San Diego.  Waves were not quite as strong here but they broke further out, which enabled longer rides.  Free parking as well.  From there, I went to a burger joint just about a mile up the road where I ended up eating with a random woman named Tina.  

After lunch, it was a scenic ride to the marina with views of the San Diego skyline to the race expo.  After much back and forth deliberation, I decided it would be okay to participate in the 5K as a walker.  I checked into my hotel then found the starting line for tomorrow's race.  

Next was a walking tour of downtown San Diego on Market Street through the Gaslamp quarter to Kansas City Barbeque (Top Gun bar).  In a mild disappointment, nobody commented on my resemblance to Val Kilmer.  I took an alternate route back through Little Italy and chatted a bit with several people at a sports bar on the way back.  I find it easy to talk with locals here.  Perhaps Southerners mix well with laid back California culture.

8/17- Race morning.  A road race from the very back of the pack was a new experience for me.  Even when I was fast, I always had SERIOUS issues with people who make fun of slower runners.  Anyone who makes an earnest effort and gets out there deserves our respect.  Some people just wanted to take in the experience and didn't seem to put much effort into it but there were others who were honestly giving it their best.  My brisk walk was almost as fast as their run but I still applaud them.  

I walked about 80 percent of the course but did incorporate some very slow and easy jogging at regular intervals.  I could still feel the pain in my hamstring but don't think I made it any worse.  I knew better than to push it.  Of course, it was a personal worst by more than a mile but I didn't care.  The only goal was to finish without aggravating the injury.  According to the results, I wasn't even close to being the last finisher.  I placed 45th out of 55 in my age group and did something positive that I have never done before.  I negative split a 5K for the first time with the back half being about a minute faster than the first half.  Can't say that I enjoyed this experience but it wasn't as depressing as I expected.  

My only irritation came afterwards when I was denied entry to the beer garden without an ID even though my bib listed my age.  Maybe I still appear under 40 but certainly not under 30.  Ridiculous.  In the end, it probably worked out for the best. By leaving early, I had an easier time finding parking at La Jolla Shores, which was a mess in the afternoon.  

La Jolla Shores has a darker green tint and gentler waves but crystal clear water that was so clear that you could see to the bottom.  Yes, such American beaches do exist outside of Florida.  I left just after noon and drove about 20 minutes to Torrey Pines for lunch and a short hike.  

From Torrey Pines, it was only about 20-30 minutes to Oceanside via the Freeway.  Oceanside is a beautiful area with tall palm trees lining the streets.  I had another good surf session.  Oceanside has clear water too but it's a more aqua tint like Laguna.  Less seaweed but no cliffs.  

8/18- Had time for another dip in Oceanside before check out.  I got to see it in all its glory with crystal clear skies today.  After lunch at In & Out Burgers, I had a little bit of dead time because it was only 1 hour to Anaheim and the game didn't start until 6:30.  

I decided to take a short detour through Compton, the birthplace of gangsta rap.  Certainly a rough area but it's not nearly as dangerous as it was in the early 90s.  I've seen worse neighborhoods but I knew better than to get out of my car or venture outside of the main roads.  At any rate, I arrived safely in Anaheim around 3 and just chilled at a very nice pool at my hotel.  

Angel Stadium is my 22nd ballpark and ranks in the middle of the pack.  It's got some nice mountain views but you can tell that it's an old facility.  The game was nothing special as the Angels lost 4-1.  At least I can say that I saw Future HOFer Mike Trout live.  I believe that makes 8 losses in row for the home team.  Yes, I've seen some bad teams but I should get lucky once.  

8/19- Got to sleep in a bit with the flight out being at 12:30.  I had to contend with a bit of Freeway traffic but had more than enough time.  There was a short delay on my first flight but fortunately I had a 2 hour layover scheduled so it didn't affect my connection.  I still got home at a half decent hour.

Excellent trip overall.

Injury Update

 Day 3 and I have improved.  I jogged VERY gingerly for about 20 yards in the parking lot this morning.  It was painful and done with a significant limp but just 2 days earlier, I could not even do that.  No, I didn't strain it further and I know better than to push my luck.  

I should be able to enjoy the ocean as per usual but I actually hope that waves are in the 2-3 foot range rather than 4-6.  5 days out from race day and I'm afraid it's a no go.  I've thought about walking it but I'll probably just skip it.  Knowing me, I am liable to push it beyond my limits and make it worse.  

I predicted anywhere from 2 weeks of rest to up to 8.  Most likely, it will be in the 3-4 week range.  I will not run until I am 100 percent pain free.  

As for the pills, I am off the ADHS.  The only thing I take besides the methylation support is Vitamin C.  It does give me a bit of a temporary boost but it's short lived.  When I get back, I'll try an anti-parasite supplement but I have little confidence that it will work.

Hamstring Strain

 My first injury since 2019 when I twisted my ankle on a pine cone in the parking lot.  Before that I hadn't been hurt since 2014, but given the minimal volume, there should not be much risk.

I really don't think I did anything wrong.  I slow jogged before this and did a few moderately fast strides.  I simply could not handle the speed in my weakened condition.  

As I feared, I am now completely intolerant to ADHS.  Vitamin C does help for a while but the positive effects don't last and it appears to be an insatiable need.  I tried to sprint all out after taking the C.  Though I was still a little stiff and sore, I was moving well.  Pleased, I increased the effort and it felt great.  For about 10 seconds.  About 15 seconds in, my legs started going numb but I was only about 50 meters away from the finish.  I thought I was losing control of my legs and was afraid that I was going to fall.  That would have sucked if I did.  I would have had bad cuts and scratches.  I decided to ease up and cruise it in.  Even still, it would have been my fastest recorded time for that distance.

Too late.  In mid-stride, I felt a sudden stabbing pain in my lower right hamstring.  No pop or tearing sound but I knew immediately that it was serious.  Fortunately I didn't try to continue.  I stopped immediately and remained on my feet.  After walking a few steps, I made a half hearted attempt to slow jog but could not.  Too painful and I knew from the first step.

Is it Grade 1 or 2?   Probably 2.  The day after the injury is usually as bad as it gets.  I am able to walk without much discomfort and it's actually worse when I am seated in certain positions but even 1 step of slow jogging is just too painful.  7 days out from race day, I'm afraid it's out of the question.  Best case scenario is 2-3 weeks recovery time but more likely 4-6 with 6-8 being the worst case 

I'm not terribly upset about the missed race.  Even if it's a good day, the best that I can hope for is a time in the mid-high 27s or just under 9:00 pace.  I never should have signed up being this unstable.  I got excited after 1 relatively good week with much progress.  I will still go to California but I may have to take it easy in the surf.  A wipeout could aggravate it.  Ugh!  Probably should have opted for Washington State.  Hopefully, I will see some improvement over the next 4 days.  

What upsets me the most is that if my pills were stable, this probably never happens.  Since the "miracle" with the Malic Acid that may well have solved the autoimmune reactions, it's been one thing after another.  First, the need for stimulants then flip flop flip then intolerance to Malic Acid then overstimulation from CoQ10 then the extreme Vitamin C need and intolerance to ADHS.  Now this!  Will it ever end?  Probably not.  I CAN NEVER BE HAPPY UNLESS THIS IS AT LEAST UNDER CONTROL!   MY 3 DEMANDS ARE HARDLY UNREASONABLE!!

Training 8/4-8/10

 8/4- Repeated the 2 mile distance this time on Lakeshore.  Improved to 21:11 (10:35 pace).  MINUS 48 compared to yesterday.  Solid improvement but as I predicted, not an instant rebound.  Only 67 degrees this morning.  Summer is not over yet but it's nice to get a break.  Added a half mile cool.

Took just 1 CoQ10 and felt noticeably worse immediately.  Sure hope it's not an autoimmune reaction.  Probably just too much of a stimulant.  I have been good about avoiding energy drinks but still drink an occasional Coke.  I've noticed that I lose something after that as well.

Distance-2.5

8/5- Back to the new normal.  Lakeshore 2.5 in 22:55 (9:10 pace) with a sub-9 on the back half.  Splits were 11:46-11:09 so that's a pretty solid finish.  ADHS plus methylation support is a winning formula and I will not try to mess with it.

PM- Took a pot shot at the sub-8 Mile.  Got off to a fast start but it didn't feel right.  Pace fell off after 200 meters but held it near 8:00 pace for the next 400.  Punted at 800 still under 4:00 but fading and slow jogged the last 2 laps.  

You might think that I was just too tired from the morning but I can tell the difference between natural fatigue and pill issues.  This is clearly the latter.  It seems like I took too much ADHS.  I predicted that my need would diminish without CoQ10 but I SHOULDN'T REACT BADLY TO A MODULATOR!  Too much of a suppressant can hurt but a modulator?  Should not!

Distance-3.5

8/6- AM- Needed an extra hour of sleep because of crazy dreams.  Dreamed that I hung out with a guy from my childhood that I  haven't even thought about in several years. We didn't like each other growing up and didn't like each other in the dream either.  LOL.  

Did have time for Sprint tests.  Did a 41/32 plus a warm and cool.  The final sprint felt good.  I am still too dependent on ADHS but the dosage will be reduced and I may no longer need the afternoon dose 

PM- Hoped to run 3.5 from the Shak.  Called it quits after 1 Mile in 10:03.  Cut the ADHS from 9 pills to 6 but it was still too much.  Concern, panic or doom?  Concern but on the edge of panic.  It's not a surprise that cutting CoQ10 affected the adrenal balance.  I plan to cut it down to 4 tomorrow and I had better see significant improvement.

Distance-1.5

8/7-AM- 2 miles in 17:56 (8:58 pace) plus a cool.  Splits were 9:10-8:46 with most of disparity coming in the last quarter mile.  Still concerned but no panic.  I still need the pills but there is a magic number, which is clearly going down.  Am I headed towards complete intolerance?  If so, I got big trouble.  Took only 3 pills this morning and will take 1 in the afternoon.

PM- Noticeably weaker after the afternoon dose (just 1 pill).  After a half lap warm, I ran another half lap at base effort and clocked an 83 (8:18 pace).  Over a full mile, I estimate that I was good for a low-mid 9.  Better than yesterday afternoon but clearly a step backwards from this morning.  

New theory:  The Zinc/Copper ratio in ADHS is only 10:1, which is too low.  At a low dose, it probably doesn't matter, but on 8 pills, it sure does.  Popped a Zinc pill and walked back to the start line for the half.  Time improved to 74 (7:24 pace).  If the problem with ADHS is a Zinc/Copper imbalance rather than adrenal suppression, that makes me feel a LOT BETTER!

Distance-3.0

8/8- Took 1 Liver pill last night and it wrecked me.  Not a big surprise and it was a risk that I was willing to take to confirm the Zinc/Copper issue.  This ratio is often problematic with Autism and I don't believe it is an autoimmune reaction.

I was worthless this morning.  I would have been better off without ANY ADHS pills but just 2 of those made it much worse.  Just slow jogged 1 Mile untimed.  Even Zinc was not enough to counteract the Copper in the Liver pills but Vitamin C was effective.  That's what I'm going with until San Diego.  Lots of new experiments to come afterwards.

PM- Turned away at the DMV in an attempt to get a STAR ID.  AARGH!  Fortunately my passport should still work.  I never reported it lost to the government.  2 sprint with and without Vitamin C.  57 without and a 40 with.  Gap of 17.  If I simply need to add Vitamin C to my cocktail, I can live with that as long as it doesn't become a magic number.

Distance-1.5

8/9- DISASTER.  Took some Vitamin C and felt like it triggered the need for ADHS again, which is actually what I wanted to see.  Took 3 ADHS- pills and quit after just a half mile in 5:38 plus a warm.  Got home and took more Vitamin C.  Tried to sprint and I was moving fast.  It felt good for a few seconds then my hamstring gave way.  Likely out for San Diego.

Distance-1.0

8/10- Unplanned rest day.  Too soon to say how long I will be out.

13 miles on the week